Getting Outside My Head

So much has happened the past 9 months. Good, bad and devastating. Some things I have shared with family and friends...too much at times...and some things I will never share. It has all affected me and changed me.

At one point I felt like I had hit rock bottom. But was reminded of my beautiful daughter. I really do not know what I would do without her. I am so thankful for her gift.

At times I felt as though I had really lost myself. I looked for others opinions instead of just doing what I thought I should do. I wanted everyones approval and I wanted everyone to be happy. I wanted drama to end yet I kept creating it. In my head issues that we small would become huge and I would let it consume me.

I now want to be happy. I want what I want and not what others think I should want. Many will not be happy. I still want everyone to be happy but know it is not possible. I am ready to lead my life and not what I think other want me to do.

I will be making some life changing decisions soon. It is what I want and I hope I keep the courage to go through with it. Nothing huge...nothing bad...just something for us. I am ready to take a chance and stop taking the comfortable easy road.

Hey...everyone(my two readers)...Have a great day.

I write this today so that I will look back on it in case I decided to take the easy road instead of the less traveled by.

You are remembered today and always.

On the way to school one morning....

M: Mom, if God created the world then where were we??
Mom: Well...we came after the world....

M: Mom, if people created the roads..how come we did not see them build the roads? You know like by church.
Mom: Well.....we were not here yet.

M: Oh...like on vacation....
Mom: No....we just were not here yet....

M: Hmmm.... we must have been far away....

Heavy thoughts for a 3yr old I would say.

It has started...my life on the couch. I really enjoy TV too much. Last night was great TV! I really need to invest in Tivo though. I miss so much or can't watch due to content with M in the house. This must be worked out...

My make believe world has started and I love it! :)