Getting Outside My Head

My morning is just not going well. Molly was up every hour last night teething. She would wake up cry for a few minutes and go back to sleep...so that means no sleep for mommy.

I had planned to come into the office early to work on month end...instead I slept through my alarm and woke up 45 minutes late! Got up, rushed through getting ready and then when it came to clothes ....URGH! I put on one outfit...it looked fine but I was afraid it was just too casual. My friend probably would have loved it but I thought it just was not right for the office...maybe casual day.(I am pretty conservative when it come to the office) SO.....on to trying to find something to wear.

My clothes are not only TOO BIG but also extremely OLD! I have tried to shop and I suck! I need new clothes! I hate being out of fasion. I make due with what I have but damn! I am shopping this weekend! I have tons to do(work related) but I am going to have to find the time. I hate to take Molly...but the girl is going because I NEED NEW CLOTHES!! What fun is it to lose weight if you can't show it off!

Okay....little stressed...calming down now. Oh...had a good weekend. Went out, worked and played with the baby....and friend of course.

Ohh....and I forgot my glasses! Yes...they are at home! URGH!!! It is going to get better right?? YES!! :)

Ya know...I try and teach Molly things all the time. She speaks so well it amazes me half the time. Her new thing is that she will cover her mouth with her hand when she coughs. Sometimes she will pat her chest and then cover her mouth but when she hears someone else cough she will look at them and cover her mouth.

I thought this was cute but normal. I am starting to think I am wrong. Today at school the other children were coughing and not one of them covered their mouth. Now Molly is one of the youngest in this class at 16 months and she looks over at the older kids and covers her mouth. It was pretty funny.

The teacher(of the older class) mentioned how smart Molly is and that I really need to put her in another school. This is now every teacher Molly has had to say that statement.

I know we all think our children are smart and pretty but I think I am more the other way. I look at it as children are children each different...but I do like the fact that teachers who do not even know each other have all made the same comment.

Time to dig dig dig into the pocketbook and come up with an extra $300 a month to move her to another school.

She is just such a sweetie!

Had a pretty good weekend. Friday we(Molly and I...and my friend) went over to the Josh and Camille's. K & M brought over the groceries and Josh cooked em up. It was great. Beverages and groceries and good company. Molly had a blast. She played hard and then waved good-bye and went to bed. Us, so called adults, then played Trival Pursuit. The girls kicked some mean butt!!

Saturday was shopping day. Yes...that is what I said. We(Molly and I and...the friend) went to lunch and then off to the mall. My friend was WONDERFUL! He pushed her stroller and played with her all day while I shopped. I was ready to go at one point and he said no...keep shopping he was good. I did not get what I went for, clothes for me, but I did get many things for Molly. With the weather warming up she needs some clothes.

Sunday we had planned to go to the Irish Festival but I fell ill. :( He was great about it. I was extremely dissappointed. I really wanted to go. He took care of me and I have to say that was wonderful! He let me lay on his lap and take a nap. How great is that!!! It meant the world to me.

So, the weekend started out great but took a little wrong turn.

It is extremelt difficult to balance work and family. I was one that was completely consumed with my job. It was my life and nothing else came first. Now that I have Molly my position has changed. My work is still extremely important but not as important as my child.

Being a single mom, it is not an easy thing to get a sitter. I do not trust many people so only my family babysits(yes, this includes Camille). My brother babysits often so I can work and on several occasions I have asked my parents who live in OK to sit for over a weekend so that I can work.

I think I do well. It is so hard to balance the two when projects arise. My plate is full at the office and at home. I feel my daughter has had the raw end of the deal many times. This really sucks.

Keep your fingers crossed that 22nd is a good day and not a pink slip day.

My friend had family in town this past week and I have been swamped at work so I did not get to see too much of him. :( I was able to get away Friday afternoon to go to lunch with him and meet his younger brother. The brother was really nice and really shy. However, I did manager to make him laugh and he did participate in the conversations which my friend noticed so I think that is a good sign. I am waiting to hear what the family says. The brother will go back and chat with the mother and then the mother will tell my friend what was said. I think it will be all good....I was pretty nervous at first but within seconds became comfortable. That could be a good or bad thing. :)

Molly is with my father so that I could work yesterday and today. I miss my girl. She woke up yesterday morning with her eyes swollen shut so I had to take her to the dr.(I HATE HER SCHOOL) Dr said it was a virus that settled in her eyes. My dad still took her so I was grateful and upset at the same time. She is doing much better today. They are having a blast in OK.

Well...I am about to head out of the office and to the bar for MARGARITA time!!! I am craving a margarita on the rocks soooooo bad!!!

Happy Sunday!

It has been crazy the past few weeks. I have been working many hours, had Camille's baby shower, been ill...worked more.... Man....and I have more hours at the office to go!

I let my friend babysit for the first time the other night. He did a great job!! He is going to help me next weekend and babysit pretty much the entire weekend while I work. I feel like I have not seen my daughter in months!! But anyway..I stated I had to work this weekend but from home and he was sad...he wants me to go to the office so he and Molly can play! I think he gets real silly with her when I am not around....he gets embarrassed. She has him wrapped around her little finger!!

Well...I will be back to post again soon...hope all is well with everyone!

Okay..so I did not make my deadline at work(I think that is the FIRST time in my career!) but it was okay. We pushed the downlod back two weeks. However, next week is month end and I have been told "I HAVE to be in the office the entire weekend". That means no work on the my project next weekend. The next week will be full with close project and then that weekend is Easter. I will work Saturday but not Sunday!

My friend is on call this weekend. He was going to help me out so that I could work and he would watch Molly. It is now after 4:00 and he is still not here. I am so screwed! Once he gets here if he gets a call, I will have to get off the computer so he can use his to take care of the issue.

Molly is now upstairs crying her eyes out because I am trying to make her take a nap so I can get some work done. Looks like that will not be happening anytime soon. She has been crying for 20 minutes now.

I am so worn out. It seems like I am about to cry every two minutes. So much going on and it is starting to get overwhelming.

On top of everything at the office and forget about family issues my lease is up. I am looking at moving into a house in Flower Mound close to the "network" of friends. That means rent will go up, moving costs...packing time....

...she is still crying. He just called and said he would be here in 15 mins and would take care of everything. But ya know it is not his problem. It is mine. I just am not juggling work and home very well right now. I just can not work all these hours.

Just Getting Outside My Head for a moment.

I have so much to say that I have nothing to say...does that make sense? It does to me.

Camille is having a baby...did you know that???I thought I did till recently. She is going to be mom. WoW! I am so excited for her. Her entire life is about to change...you think you know it but when it happens it is so amazing!

I have a daughter. I just look at her and still think WoW! I have a daughter. This child is mine...she was in my belly. I can not even remember life without her. She adores my friend and he adores her. It is great and scary at the same time. It feels like we have been together for a long time but we really have not. So it scares me that she is getting attached too soon. I guess I just really never have thought of her having a "father figure" and now that she does I am not so sure of what I think about it. But when I see them together it is as if they were meant to be. Pretty scary..uh..

Anyway....I am watching my girl eat dinner and watch $pongeBob. She loves her some $pongeBob. She is so beautiful. Oh...and she quacks like a duck! If you ask her what a ducks says she replies "QUACK QUACK QUACK!" It is soooo cute!

Gotta run it is time for dessert. Some nice fresh fruit!