Getting Outside My Head

Ok, a friend of mine is in town from Austin. I have known her since JR High school. I helped her raise her first two children for the first couple of years of their life. She has now divorced her husband and just had another child with her boyfriend. Her older boys are 14 and 12 ( I think). Her youngest son is about 8 or 9 months.

She smoked through all the pregnancies and she may have drank as well. Now I stuck by her and stayed out of her business. She asked once during her first pregnacy how I felt about smoking and I told her that I did not agree with it. But I never said another word...it was none of my business. She was an adult.

okay after all that....

WELL, today she gets a hold of me and wants to see me while she is down. I think great...I have not seen her in a while and I can't wait to see the kids. You know where she asks to meet me????????????

At a club!!! She says.."Why don't you meet us at so in so Saturday night..you don't have to drink if you don't want too." OK NO!!

I respond by stating that I would prefer to see her somewhere else due to that I do not want to be around so much smoke and would like to see the kids as well. SHE LAUGHED AT ME!! Then she stated, "I am not laughing at you I am laughing with you". I was irritated but only said, "I do not drink caffine, I do not smoke or go to places with a large amount of smoke and do not drink...if you think that is funny that is fine but it is my choice." She continues to laugh and finished with "Wait till your next baby..you will be drinking and smoking away". I just replied by saying, "No, this is just what I believe is best for me and the baby".

OK first of all I do not smoke. And I kept my mouth shut through THREE of her pregnancies about how I felt about her smoking etc..... because it was none of my business!!! It really upset me.

I don't care if someone smokes and drinks and does whatever and their baby comes out just fine....I choose not to take any chances! You want to laugh..then do it behind my back!! And her kids do have problems due to her smoking!! Her baby was sick and the doctor told her it was taking longer for him to get better due to her smoking...she said he did not know what he was talking about. She totaly did not believe him.

URGH! I was having a great day..that pissed me off. I wish I would have said more. I am sure I will if I go see her tomorrow.

oh..oh...when she mentioned about me coming over to where she is staying..she says, " well I do not think she smokes in the house..is that up to your stanards?" What a smartass. I told her that was not a problem and it was not a problem if she smoked in the house, but a club is too much!! I have been to this shithole and the haze is so think you can not see through it!!!!

Ok...I am calming down. Maybe I am just too nice to people...maybe I should go around telling everyone my opinion acting like it is the gospel and everyone should do as I say.

NAH.... to each their own.

Ok..sorry I did not realize how long my rant got... I am trying to shorten them.

Oh well...

Today I am 28 weeks pregnant so I go for my last high risk sonogram. This follow-up visit it to see if my placenta previa has cleared itself up.

I hope it is have moved to the correct place. If not I think I am ok with the understanding of having the bby early. I just want to be able to carry the baby as long a I can for her safety.

So, if you have any extra time today please think a pleasant thought for me.

Thanks and have a great day!

I can not believe that I went to the doctor and received GOOD NEWS!!!

My placenta moved!!! It needed to move by 2cm and it moved 2 1/2 cm. Just enough!!! I am very happy. No worries of pre-term labor and hospital bed rest.

Thanks to everyone for their happy thoughts!!! It worked!!

Oh my!! I love my pic!! Thank you Camille!!!

Ok...could not get the pic to post...go check it out at Camille's until I get it here.

HOT! HOT! HOT!

Well, I had to take out the plastic filament from my navel this morning around 2:30am.

Since I had the barbell taken out last week and replaced with plastic filament(so that my belly can stretch) I have not felt so well. The area became red and sore and yesterday it was swollen and you could see infection. I felt so bad Saturday and Sunday and really was not sure why.

Sunday night the pain around my navel was so bad it scared me. It hurt to even lay on my side, my entire belly started to hurt and the redness was spreading over my stomach. Around 2:30ish am I could not take the pain any longer and was worried so I took out the filament.

Feels better today but still infected. I think I am allergic to the filament. DARN!

Wanted to keep the piercing, but not worth risking infection of any kind while pregnant.

Thanks for the picture of my MAN!!!

I feel like high school...but I just had to have it. And I love his new tattoo. Isn't he so sweet!!!

:)

A co-worker gave me the best gift...

Boudreaux's Butt Paste

It is diaper rash cream...what a great name!!!!!!

:)

Last night my friend Carla took me out for my birthday. I had a really good time!!

We just went to the Trinity Pub(not smokey at all) and had drinks and dinner. I had non-alcoholic beer and water ..she had the real stuff. It was so nice. I can not remember the last time I have gone to just hang out with a friend and talk at a restaurant.

I was just going to sit home and do nothing...I am so glad I did not!

Thanks for getting me out in the real world Carla!

Ok...season finale tonight!!

Is it Dorothy...Bill...Heather??

I am such a dork....I am excited!

Well...Bill was the Mole, Dorothy won and our Dallas chick lost.

Heather did it to herself...poor thing! If she had not made an alliance with Dorothy she would have won. Great show!! I really wanted Heather to win but was ok with Dorothy!!

I do like that show. It was funny to me that Dorothy was not the Mole, still messed up so many challenges and then won the game. She is a smart girl, that is for sure!!

One thing that really gets my goat is when people "tell me" what I know. Now this covers a broad scope, but today's rant is about "when people tell me how I feel"!

This has been an extremely emotional week for me and it is not even over. I know most of the time I must sound so negative and depressing, but I use this vehicle to get things out of my head.

Let me first say how glad I am yesterday is over!!!!! I cried all day...the hormones were working overtime! By 6:00pm I was so bad, I could not breathe. I drove home in uncontrolable sobbs.(yes, more things happened yesterday that I am just not ready to blog about yet)

I feel much better today. I know what has happened is my fault, but it is also his. What is done is done and can not be changed now. I just need to focus on the positive.

If I am paying for things I have done in the past, I am ok with that for I know all will come back to him one day as well.

So, yesterday is gone...it is over.... Lets start today! :)

Well....she told me!!!

She was kicking around down there..little but frequent kicks. They started to get very uncomfortable...so all I did was... pat my stomach with both hands and say "Sweetie...you need to calm down a little...just settle down..ok"

She replied with a STRONG kick to the middle of my belly!!! I bet her foot print is embedded above my belly button! ...lol...

I think I am going to have my hands full when this one is born. All moms say that you get back all that you give when your a child.....oh no!!! Not another me!

:)

From Kelly and Julie.

1) What's your personal clothing style....trendy or classic? I would think classic, but others would say trendy
2) Do you shop for designer names or stick with the more generic brands? I am a designer person..but not a logo person
3) Work Clothes: dressy or casual? dressy casual...but I used to be dressy only
4) Days off style: dressy or casual? dressy casual I would say...again others might say dressy
5) Women: High-heels or flats? Men: Wing-tips or work boots? I am more of middle of the row...since I am no longer "dressy" at work, I do not wear high-heels anymore, but I do wear shoes with a medium heals.
6) Do you have a large wardrobe, or just a few carefully selected pieces? If you ask me..I say I do not have enough clothes..ask others and they say I have too many.
7) Do you shop for clothing at stores or from catalogs/internet? Clothing stores...I have tried catalogs, they are ok but I like to try clothes on before buying.
8) Are most of your clothes dry-clean only or machine washable? I am a dry-cleaning fool!!!
9) You buy an article of clothing and realize it is all wrong for you when you get home. Return or keep it? Keep it. I have several items in my closet that should have been returned..that is one reason I am not a big catalog shopper.
10) Hats: yes or no? In my 20's I was a huge hat fan and had many to go with all my little outfits.....these days...No.. face just too chubby.

I really need to invest in a computer for my house..but then I think...it will just be another bill.

You have overpriced cable, overpriced phone and now overpriced interenet access.

One day I will give in.....one day!

Ok...I was found by this search!

I think that tops all of you!

Yuck!

Well, believe it or not my tests came back negative for gestational diabetes and anemia. YEA!!!

My doctor just knew the tests would be positive due to my history during this pregnancy...so I am so excited that she was wrong!!! No shots for me!!!!

:)

Ok, yes,...I watch American Idol. Two girls from the Dallas area are in the top 5. Kelly is great and I hope she wins.....Nikki I have liked from the beginning, but knew she would not win.

Nikki started out really good. Great style, great songs and great performances. It got her to where she is, but her last three performances have been awful and I think she will be out tonight.

I think the pressure has gotten the best of her. Her performances are just not up to the level they need to be...they are not even the level of her earlier performances.

So.......sorry kiddo! She did a great job though..most would have never made it that far. I wish her the best!

Its me, Camille. Since Shelby has no computer at home, she will not be able to blog until next Tuesday. Just know that she and Molly are both okay.

Hi Shelby's Readers! I went by and visited with Shelby today and she is feeling good. She is to still be on bedrest thru Tuesday, but expects good news at her next doctor visit. She looks really great, and all her stories about her being HUGE, is soooo not right. I took pictures and hope to have them posted some time this weekend. Shelby appreciates and thanks every one of you for the well wishes.

Well, I am back at the office again.

Everything is fine and I am feeling much better than last week. Thank you to everyone for sending me their happy thoughts. They worked!

Looks like I will probably be working half days until the birth. Still have to work out things here at the office, but have high hopes that I will be able to retain as much of my salary as possible.

Good to be back in the land of the living! Just have to remember to take things a little easier. I am sure Camille will have no trouble helping me out with that.

:)

No...not the show..but I wish!

While I was out our department moved from one floor to another. What a mess! I am still in a damn cube!(it is much bigger though) This cube will have more privacy, but at the moment there is a 2 foot section of the wall missing in the center. The piece has been ordered, but if one more person stops by and says "I'd like to order a quarter pounder and fries" I am just goint to scream!!

It was not funny the first time and really was not funny the 100th time!!!! I think I will have to put a sign up that reads...

"Pregnant women with no Patience..BE WARE!!"

Ok....one other complaint. My desk was packed, my computer equipment...speakers..cables..etc... all packed and LABELED!!!!

Well....the little people on this floor decided since it sat for a day they would take whatever they wanted out of the boxes!!!! Then one of these people had the nerve to act like that was ok and argue why he was right in what he did.

WHATEVER! I explained to him why it was wrong and that I was not going to argue with him...he did not want to return the items because then he would not have them! Can you believe this?? I explained that was not my problem and he needed to return them ASAP!

That person returned the items..the rest cables and such have to be ordered.

People really amaze me at times!

I really do not want to go on half days...I want to work and get paid and be involved.

I don't want to see those checks.....Please have happy thoughts that I will be able to work from home with full pay and something like that.....

I owe ya'll a great deal for these happy thoughts!!!

Yes...I know I am a loser....I am still into American Idol.

But...WOW what a shocker that Tamyra was voted off by the public. Now..I still like Nikki...but Tamyra is a better singer. ...WOW....

Nikki and Kelly are back in Dallas this morning. Both were on talk shows. Caught Nikki on a local radio show...she was extremely shocked herself to still be in running. She is really excited but still coming down from the surprise. She knew she was the one to be kicked off so she had prepared herself for that result.

Well...keep it up Nikki! I still love your style.... I would love to see her in the final two with Kelly!!

Kelly....I think has it in the bag now. I really thought her main competition was Tamyra...not anymore!!!

Congrats to both Texas girls!!!

I must say you guys have the best HAPPY THOUGHTS ever!!!!! Thank you so much!!

Looks like I will be working from home with pay starting Monday!!! They are getting a laptop and printer ready as we speak.

Thanks guys!!!

Gonna be weird working from home and not seeing people!!!

Ok, Camille posted pics.(on the right side) Remember that I am pregnant. One is a belly shot and I was talking when she took the picture.

So for you people that wanted the pics here they are.....URGH I hate pics of me..I am NOT photogenic at all!

Ok...I will be 8 months pregnant next week..!! WOW...I can not believe how time flies!!!

Which John Cusack Are You?

Saw this over at Susan's. I just love
John Cusack.

I went and had a manicure, pedicure and eyebrow wax on Friday afternoon. It was so nice and relaxing.

Saturday, went to see the movie Blue Crush. I liked it. Good ocean photography and for a teen type movie..it was pretty good. The story was not too over the top in my opinion. Many characters were the actual surfers so the shots were great.

Sunday, Camille and I went to finish up my baby registery stuff. She is such a great friend. She drove all over North Dallas for about an hour or so until I made up my mind where to eat lunch. I am still not all that hungry and NEVER want food so it was difficult. The place I did want to go was packed and she would not help decide. We ended up at mexican food place...it was ok.

Got home a 7:00. I was exhausted and still am...but had so much fun. It was so great to just hang out with her and Josh.

Thanks guys!

This e-mail was forwarded to me and I am not one to forward on, but liked this today. Kinda long..but cute at the end.

WOMEN

They smile when they want to scream.
They sing when they want to cry.
They cry when they are happy and laugh when they are nervous.
They fight for what they believe in.
They stand up for injustice.
They don't take "no" for an answer when they believe there is a better solution.
They go without new shoes so their children can have them.
They go to the doctor with a frightened friend.
They love unconditionally.

Well..I am finally set up to work from home. I will go into the office about once a week or every other week.

I think I am going to like this!!

I can not believe I am 8 months pregnant today!!

It seems like timewas going by so slow....and now it has really sped up.

I am anxious and scared. I am having those.."I wonder what the baby will look like" thoughts. And can you believe this....all this time I have been so worried about getting too big..this week I have been worried I am not big enough. Baby stomach of course. I know I am fine because the Dr has been ok with my progress. It is funny how your moods and thoughts change on a dime.

It is just really amazing! Little Molly is still extremely active. I wish I could explain it too you.

I feel like I have been away forever! I have not had time to read anyone's blog.

I will make up some time this weekend. I missed everyone. Just have been so busy at the office. Now at home I have much more time.

Saturday night - 9:00pm

I am so bored! Got my dose of Big Brother 3 and then watched the end of The Fast and the Furious. Waiting for the baseball game to end and then will watch Bull Duram for the millionth time.

I have plenty to do around the house but my lazy day has kept me tired. I was going to clear out the babies room, but of course I did not do that. I really need to get it done this weekend.

Miss Molly is not having a lazy day though. She has been all over the place. It is just amazing to watch my belly move around. I wonder what position she is in and if that was her hand or foot.

Oh well..enough of boring you. Have a good weekend!